Calling all Type A scheduled Mamas!!! đ Itâs time to let go of your tightly gripped bedtimes and enjoy a night out with the family! Seriously!! Bending the rules every now and then is totally fine. In fact, itâs part of reaping the benefits of a great sleeper!
Before I begin working with a family I typically hear thoughts likeâŠ
âWell, Becca, Iâm just not a schedule person and I really donât want to be tied down to a strict bedtime. I want to be able to be flexible!.â
âMy family has a weekly dinner and we really donât want to miss it. How could we sleep train and still be able to attend these?â
I have to say that before I had kids, I definitely thought I would be like that first parent. (Donât we all say things before having kids?!) I would say things like, âOh, Iâm just going to bring my kid with me and weâre going to do the same things we do now. Itâs not going to be that big of a deal, I mean, our child will be on our schedule.â
Oh my gosh!đ€ŠđŒââïž I was so naive!
It didnât take me very long to understand that not only was that impossible, it was terrible for my baby!!
So now I totally laugh and just give a little side eye when I hear about parents who are expecting their first child say things like that. Itâs okay, everyone needs a learning curve!
But today, letâs celebrate your great sleeper and make a PLAN for bending the rules to enjoy a night out!
ENJOYING A DATE NIGHT OUT:
First of all, get a babysitter who you are confident will do what you ask!! Share with them in great detail how you do your bedtime routine and specifically share how baby can fall asleep independently!! Baby will know exactly what to do because youâve trained them bedtime routine equals going to bed!!
Or, maybe yourâe like me who prefers to live a double life?! I donât know why, but I just really love bedtime with our girls. So Chad and I prefer to put the girls down and then leave a monitor with a sitter! I totally feel like Iâm living this double life and our girls never know!!
Itâs so freeing that we can enjoy a date night out without having to worry about anyone calling and asking us to come home quickly so we can rock the baby back to sleep. Itâs so amazing! Freedom really does come with being consistent.
STAYING LATE AT A FRIENDâS HOUSE
If youâve been invited over for dinner with friends or family, it IS possible to stay late and enjoy the evening with everyone! No more having to dine + dash!
Before you go, ask the friends or family members if you can bring a pack ân play to set up in a quiet, dark space. Maybe a closet? Guest room? A room where you can set up the SlumberPod? I bet theyâll say yes! So when youâre at their home for dinner, simply slip away for bedtime routine! Do a sink bath or a wipe down, offer a feed for baby, put on PJs, read a quick book, say goodnight and lay down in the pack n play. Leave the room, and viola!! Baby goes to sleep! Pretty wonderful party trick!
Now, whenever you’re ready to leave (hours later) simply go into the room and pick up your baby. Stick them in the carseat and drive home! When you arrive home pick them up, go into their room, say goodnight again, and theyâll go to sleep again!!
Sure, they may wake between this- but it was just a little interruption! Not a big deal, and you got to enjoy an evening with friends!! And baby slept!! Cheers!!
**hint-hint: tell your friends all about Little Zâs Sleep when your baby goes to bed so easily đ
GOING OUT TO DINNER
Yes, sometimes youâll be out past bedtime with baby wide awake! There are definitely times where you can take your kid out and go and enjoy these dinners together, and you might get home 30 minutes after bedtime! Hereâs what I want you to do:
Skip the long bedtime routine.
Just do the essentials! Get home, wipe them down, put on PJs, offer a feed, turn the lights off and get them down for bed!
Have an older child who can communicate with you? Use my favorite phrase with them:
âTonight weâre going to be a little flexible!â
On times or on nights where we have people over or weâre going out, and weâre not going to put them to bed right on the time I will tell my oldest, whoâs 3.5, âHey, you know what, tonightâs going to be a little bit flexible. We are going to get in the car, and we are going to drive to a restaurant, and weâre going to order food, and weâre going to hang out, and weâre going to talk and eat, and itâs going to be a lot of fun!! And then weâre going to come home and itâs going to be after your bedtime. So we are going to skip bath, and just brush our teeth, and put our PJs on, and we might even skip the book (because we had such a good time at the restaurant) because itâs getting late and weâre so tired! Weâll get into bed and go straight to sleep.â
And you know what? She loves these flexible nights! She understands why we skip her two favorite parts, bath and book. She can actually now start to call it out. She will start to ask us, âHey mommy, daddy, is this a flexible night?â And Iâm so proud of her for noticing a change in our schedule!
TRAVELING AT NIGHT
Leaving on a flight with your family that leaves at night? I totally understand we canât be picky on these travel days, so really- the name of the game is survival! If you have an older child, communicate with them about how itâs going to be VERY flexible. Youâll be wearing PJs on an airplane, you can bring your blanket and your buddies, and youâll even fall asleep on the airplane!
If you have a baby, youâll literally do anything to get your little one to sleep on this night flight! **TIP: Ask the airline in advance if they have bassinets available!
Driving at night is also a survival game- as I really canât guarantee your kiddo will sleep in the car at night as solid as at home. My older sister and her husband LOVE traveling at night, and their kids know the drill: bath, pjs, into the car. My husband and I? NOPE. Yaâll can probably guess that I need a full night of sleep to travel well, so we donât ever go that route! If you know youâre a night-owl and can be safe during those road hours, go for it!
ENJOY YOUR LIFE!
So, I will have to tell you that there is definitely times and places for bending the rules and being flexible; and being flexible comes with this freedom peace and freedom comes from all of the consistent work that you have done with your child. So again, whether you and I have worked together with your childâs sleep or you have DIYâd it and you have an incredible sleeper, or maybe you have one of those angel babies who sleeps 12 hours solid and you literally didnât have to do anythingâŠyouâre super lucky! Enjoy these benefits of getting your baby out or getting your child in different situations and staying out a little bit later to enjoy life because you have to!
When your baby knows how to sleep, I donât ever want you to feel like youâre in a bedtime jail!! You cannot be bound to rules and you cannot stress yourself out about sleep. I want to make sure that you are celebrating and enjoying all of the hard work that you have helped your child learn. Okay? So, my gift for you today is my Ultimate Babysitter Checklist because I told you I want you to go on a date night!
You can get my 6-page Babysitter Checklist for free HERE!!
Go enjoy bending the rules, yaâll!!
Sweet Dreams,
Becca
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